Why do I start this post with “Tee time,” you ask? We’ll it’s certainly not for golf time, even though I had plenty access to the courses when I was at the resort. Actually, “Tee” time is code for nursing my daughter.
To be quite honest, I’m kinda glad we came up with this nickname because we didn’t want her to learn to say “booby”or “teta” out loud in the grocery store. I think it was actually because my MIL kept saying the Spanish derivative, despite mommy’s annoyance of it, and that smart little girl of mine coined it. Good girl!
The reason why I bring up “Tee” time is because J is almost two in a few weeks and we’ve had alot of tee time over the last 717 days — she’ll be 2 on Aug. 23 — but now it’s time to decide if I should end our bonding journey at 2 years of age, or go a little further. I don’t think to a full three, but just a little longer wouldn’t be an issue for me.
What is an issue is how it strangely affects family and friends, and I have to question, “has our bonding time run its course?” I mean, she is almost 2 now and its rightfully common for people to ask “are you still nursing?” It makes me think, maybe I do need to stop? In fact, I recently had a conversation with a colleague (a very sweet girl in her 20’s, nowhere near being a mom!) about it and I very casually tried to address it by saying “yeah, and they do this in Europe until 4 years of age” but my colleague was quick to point out “but we’re not in Europe”.
That is very true but is it wrong to want to give my little one some personal “Tee” time beyond 2? I mean, it’s a unique experience that my MIL and certainly daddy can’t do. It’s only mommy and baby time for a short while longer.
As I think about that question, I think about all of the mommies who have tried so hard to nurse and have felt guilty for not being able to. I really do feel for those moms. I am so grateful that we never missed a beat and know that this was a blessing in its self. However, I also think back on those bumpy first times, learning about storage, buying a micro fridge, tricks for packing, and keeping endless supplies of pump parts and nursing bras. By the way, I went Medela all the way! I’ve had the greatest and not so greatest business trips where I had to take ounces upon ounces of liquid gold through TSA’s check point at the airport. The machines were scary but the agents were always very sweet, especially the men (daddies themselves, praising their wonderful wives). Or having moments of “shoot I forgot…” something, either my pump bag, an essential pump part or an ice pack to keep things cool — always having to improvise. One time when I was still working at the hotel, I forgot to bring my portable cooler and found an event ice bucket. It worked!
Since then, I have been pretty resourceful keeping my Medela near my work station, having two sets of extra parts handy and when I’m out and about in between stops at a restaurant or a function, asking the catering manager to store my cooler of fun in their walkin freezer. It’s amazing when you slap a sticky labelled “mother’s milk” how they will pay attention to your odd requests and respect not wanting to see what’s inside the mystery bag of fun.
I recall pumping in odd places at all day conferences and business workshops, and even sharing spaces with other moms with the same agenda. Or simply thinking I was on top of the world when I scored a private space with a lock and a plug, despite it being an empty cold storage room. Plus, not to mention the number of endless times, when I had J with me and it was time to feed, that I was like a hawk eye- spotting anywhere quiet, clean and private for us to have our “tee” time together.
I think the best part of going down memory lane of these moments of “tee” is that no matter when I can recall, at two days, two weeks, two months or soon to be 2-years old, I can still see that first time of “tee” by just looking into her eyes and telling myself that I made this little miracle. I’m convinced my little girl doesn’t mind either as she is still able to fall asleep to the calming and warmth of mommy’s “tee”.
Well, it’s not her birthday for another few weeks and I still have time to think about how much “tee” time I have left. In the meantime, I will keep enjoying our “tee” time together.